The State of Education in American Schools

My friend Kristi is in the student teaching phase of getting her degree in Music Education. She’s teaching at a middle school in a well-to-do school district near Cincinnati. She describes it as an “upper-middle-class” area.

Recently, her 7th and 8th grade classes had to write papers on Mozart. They should at least be decent papers, right? Well, many were, but Kristi found some interesting sentences in some of the papers she was grading.

This is not some floating around the internet list of crazy things students have written. These are actual sentences written by Kristi’s 7th and 8th grade classes from a suburban Cincinnati school district (name of the district withheld to protect the guilty).

Here are a few lesser-known facts about Mozart. I think I’m scared for the future of the U.S. with kids who are nearing high school writing things like this:

–By the age of five Mozart started composing in minutes.

–Mozart born December 5, 1756, died January 27, 1756 (Reincarnated, maybe?)

–Mozart was born in Salzburg, Australia on January 27, 1956 (He’s currently 50 years old and lives in the German district of Sydney.)

–Mozart composed many sympathies and day by day he became more famous. (The most famous sympathy card composer ever. Hallmark loves him.)

–He died in his wife’s arm in Vienna, Austria at 1am. (Everyone remembers his famous one-armed wife.)

–People are not for sure where he is buried, but some say that he is buried in an anonymous grave. (Hence not knowing where he’s buried…)

–Mozart is a very talented man, and has been his entire life.

–Wolfgang Mozart on Jan. 27, 1756. (The suspense is killing me on this one.)

–Mozart has constructed over 600 pieces of music.

–Some people think he may have been murdered by Antonio Salteri

–Although of his death, Mozart will live forever. (You know, aside from that pesky “death” part.)

–One of Mozart’s well known pieces is called “The 5th of Mozart” (Makes more sense than calling it “The 5th of Beethoven”.)

–Mozart was on TV and many people knew him from his work of music. (Somehow Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure is going through my head on this one.)

I wish I was making this stuff up.

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Comments

  1. omg…I’m crying here…
    LMAO

  2. Nice – and as a college professor in music, I have to say that my students’ papers on a similar topic were NO BETTER…

  3. Kristen – Dear God, I’d LOVE to see what your students write. Many moons ago I taught a college level Theatre 101 class, and I wish I would have saved some of the papers I graded. I would call up everyone I know to read them some of the gems I found there.

  4. I went to a school district that fits this description rather precisely. *hangs head in shame*

  5. OMG, and these kids are our future!! I’m scared already….having said that I know of some schools where the standard first line would have been “who’s Mozaret?”….thank for the giggles!

  6. Hilarious! My mother is a music teacher and I know she will love to read these. Ah, and they say that we don’t teach enough arts to children these days…

  7. Yep. I wouldn’t be surprised if it is the area I work in…tons of well-off idiots!

  8. These are the idiots that will be taking care of us when we’re old and, God forbid, running the country. Just kill me now lol