Black Friday: No Brains Needed

I’m convinced that to work a kiosk in the mall on Black Friday, you need only have a pulse and the ability to speak. Speaking well, with forethought, is not required.

The scene today as I walked by a kiosk, pushing Cordy in her stroller:

Saleswoman: Ma’am, do you straighten your hair? Could we give you a demonstration of our new hair straightener?

Me: No, I don’t straighten my hair. It’s naturally straight. (trying to walk past)

Salewoman: (looking down at Cordy) Oh. Uh, what about your daughter? Could we show you how it can straighten her hair?

Me: Are you effin’ kidding me?!?! She’s two! (walking off immediately)

Yeah, right, I want to straighten my toddler’s hair. Just as much as I want to perm it, as some people think I do. The kid won’t even let me comb her hair without thrashing around and screaming. I can just imagine her sitting still to have a hot styling appliance applied to her hair. We won’t even go into the issue that she’s too young to deal with beauty issues like that.


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  1. That is so ridiculous! Straightening a 2 year old’s hair? I agree – total idiots.

    Kudos to you for braving the mall on black friday. Hope you got some deals. I don’t usually go near a shopping mall on this day.

  2. What!? You don’t spend hours making sure that her hair is perfectly combed and fixed into an elaborate style!?

    Yeah there are a lot of super stupid people out there. The sad thing is that they breed.

  3. I think some people in general are just dumb …

    I have a friend who had a complex because a woman came up to her 9 month old daughter and said what a cute little boy she was. My friend was mortified. However, I pointed out that her daughter was wearing a lavendar jumper with flowers on it and was carrying a doll in a pink dress – obviously not a little boy.

    Some people are just oblivious.

  4. As my husband would say, even idiots need jobs too.

    But the amazing thing is, somebody hired this twit and gave her a tool that could harm someone or cause a fire.

    So who is the real idiot? Employer or employee?

  5. That is sick. Just sick.

  6. Criminey. Morons.

  7. I had a woman TWICE ask me if I wanted to try a hand cream…this will holding onto one screaming kid, bags of stuff and chasing another one.

    I even looked at her and said ‘ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!??’…she couldn’t see what the problem was.

  8. Wow. I would have been just dumbfounded.

  9. A toddlers hair? What a moron. My favorite from yesterday is the, Have you ever heard of the dead sea? Well yes, I did go to college, thanks you very much. In fact I graduated from HS too. Sheesh. And they don’t take the I am allergic to everything as serious. Oh, Ma’am, I just know you wouldn’t be allergic to this. Really cause you’re my allergist? Didn’t think so.

  10. I don’t think these people think. They’re so “into” their jobs (I bet they are forced to ask everyone) that common sense goes out the window.

  11. Mommy off the Record says:

    Are you kidding me? That is insane that she would suggest that you straighten your daughter’s hair! She’s an idiot for sure.

    p.s. congrats on one year of blogging!!

  12. It’s a good thing you walked away quickly. I bet the salesperson at the next kiosk would have tried to sell you a cell phone for your toddler.

  13. Holy crap. That is positively insane.

  14. Oish. I get asked that about my curls, but never Sweet Pea’s.

  15. My sister keeps getting asked if her two year old’s hair is ‘naturally curly’.

    I mean…what the freak else would it be? She’s two!

  16. Someone asked me if I curled Leah’s hair the other day. People really are morons.