Preparing For A New Sibling

When I found out I was pregnant in September, one of my first thoughts was: how do we prepare Cordy for this?

She had just turned 2 at the time, and while her grasp of language is pretty good for her age, we figured we wouldn’t tell her right away. Since then, I’ve tried to explain to her why mommy can’t pick her up as much (besides the fact that she’s 33 or 34 pounds solid), and why she can’t sit on mommy’s tummy. But she still shows no signs of comprehending what I’m telling her.

Then a few months ago, there was a special on Nick for the Blue’s Clues 10th anniversary, and it covered the topic of having a sibling. Meet Blue’s Baby Brother is still Tivo’d, because it is something she likes to watch at least once a week. I’m used to her walking up to me, looking up at me with pleading eyes, and saying, “Bwue’s budder? Bwue’s budder?”

So for about a month now, I sit with her when she watches it, and tell her, “Cordy will have a new family member, too.” We didn’t know if it was a boy or girl yet, but I knew that if we had a boy, we could keep using this program to prepare her for a little brother. I was even planning to buy her a Blue’s Clues shirt that features Blue hugging her little brother, saying, “I love my brother!” if it was a boy.

Well, now I need to look for another way to explain it to her. Because it looks like she’s going to have a little sister.

The doc is about 95% sure it’s a girl.

The ultrasound yesterday showed a perfectly normal baby, growing at just the right rate. Unlike Cordy, who at her 20 week ultrasound was moving around so fast the doctor couldn’t get much of a look at anything, this baby was mellow and stayed still – too still, even, which made it hard to get a look at everything. Her knees were pulled up, making it hard to look at “the goods”, but the doctor and I both saw the trademark three lines (indicating a girl) at different times. It’s possible we’ll have another ultrasound in a month or so, to confirm that this is indeed a girl.

Aaron and I are happy about having another girl. While he was leaning towards wanting a boy, we certainly don’t mind saving money by reusing all of Cordy’s old clothes and toys. And it will be fun to see the relationship between sisters. I had a sister who didn’t survive infancy, as well as a half sister who is much younger than me and I saw only a few times a year, so I never got the chance to experience that sisterly bond.

So, anyone know any good DVDs to prepare a child for a new baby sister?

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Comments

  1. Don’t have any video ideas, but congrats on it probably being a girl! I can really see Cordy with a little sister.

  2. I haven’t seen the books but

    http://www.changeisstrange.com might be good. I don’t know of any dvds, but we got Quinlan a little dolly.

    Heh.

  3. CONGRATULATIONS! A little girl! So exciting!

    If I recall you are not a huge fan of Dora but she becomes a big sister to twins a boy and a girl!

    We have been reading a lot of big sister books to Becca too and asking her to help a lot. Like we involved her in the name process (or at least so we lead her to believe!) and setting up things for the baby.

    Congrats again! So exciting!

  4. I am really, really done having children, but there is always a bit of niggling disappointment in my mind that the Pie won’t have a sister. All my friends growing up had a sister – it just seems an essential thing for a girl to have, and even now in adulthood our relationships with our sisters are pivotal in our lives. I don’t know whether anyone really needs a brother – I didn’t have one, and neither did my husband – but a sister is a really important part of the package.

    Congratulations to you and especially to Cordy!

  5. J&D used the Dora big sister episode, even though twins were involved, to get the general point across.

  6. My daughter was 16 months when I found out I was pregnant and a couple weeks over 2 when her baby brother was born. We used Dora’s gonna be a big sister books and DVD’s, there are also a ton of books out there about becoming a big brother or sister. Do some basic searches on Amazon and you’ll find plenty.

    I agree with you about the sisterly bond. I never had a sister and I would really like my daughter to experience having a sister. With 3 brothers now she’s got that covered (2 older step-brothers and her new baby brother). I guess that means another child…. 3 for me 5 for hubby, I don’t know who’s crazier. Hopefully it will be a girl, if not, well, Paige will have to get used to being the only princess in a house full of boys!!! because I will have reached my limit!!

  7. Oh and my best advice?

    Be prepared for the jealousy. The first three weeks of my son’s life were the hardest i have ever gone through. Between post-partum (baby blues) hormones, sleepless nights, feeling guilty about not being able to give Paige as much attention, and her temper tantrums and general dejection and my lack of attention….. I was wondering what on earth I had done.

    When you get to that point (and you will) just remember……IT PASSES. Cordy will adjust and in a few months it will be hard to remember what having just one was like. It is SO worth it :)

  8. Congrats to you and Cordy!

    I’ve always wished I had a sister.

  9. I’m so excited for you guys. I’m sure Aaron wanted a son, but he won’t think twice about it once you have another little girl.

    I know nothing about breaking the news to the older sibling, so I’m going to learn from what you do! I think you could still use the Blue’s Clues episode, but it could get confusing when you have to keep reminding her it’s a girl! I’m sure you’ll find a way to help her to understand!

  10. Congratulations! I’m so happy for you! The sister relationship is amazing and wonderful and frustrating as hell. Have fun!

  11. Congrats on another girl! That is awesome. And I’m sure Cordy will be fine with her sister initially. Once the new baby can share her toys, then Cordy may have a problem, but nothing you can’t teach her to get over!

    My sister and I fought a lot, but I think it’s because there is six years between us.

  12. Awww, congrats on having another girl! As a mom to 2 boys I have absolutely no advice on girls. I do know that the library is a great resource for the books/DVDs for siblings.

    How exciting!

  13. Congrats on another girl. I bet Cordy will love that!!!

  14. I don’t know any DVDs but I’m glad you write about this, I will experience it one day too.

  15. We really are leading parallel lives, aren’t we. Congrats on girl #2. Now that I’ve come to terms with it, I’m getting really excited about the idea of Thalia having a sister. I’m sure Cordy, like Thalia, will be a nurturing, loving, wonderful big sister. When she’s not hitting her in the face or whatever.

    Congrats and happy happy new year. You going to have champagne?

  16. Congrats! You will get to use all of the dresses again that you loved on Cordy. Or not, now that I think of it. You have the same problem I have, babies in different seasons.

    Cordy will be a wonderful older sister.

  17. I’m so excited for you! Two girls!! I can’t recommend any books since I only have one, but I’d google it or hit amazon. Amazon has tons of great books and DVDs really cheap.

  18. I don’t know of any DVDs, though the other shows on Noggin often have sibling episodes like the Blue’s Clues one. We read Sweet Pea some books that she LOVED on the subject. Her two favorites were from the Dr. Sears childrens library collection, entitled, “Baby on the Way,” and “What Baby Needs.” The first explains pregnancy (including why you’re tired more often than you used to be and have to sit and rest, etc.) and what will happen for Cordy when you go into labor, and the other explains what’s going on with the new baby once she’s born and home.

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