Archives for May 2006

How do you explain to a 20 month old that bad dreams are not real? Cordy woke up screaming this morning at 5am. I ran into her room, thinking that perhaps her leg was caught between the crib rails, but she was in the middle of her crib, sitting up screaming. Once she saw me, she reached for me, and I scooped her up and sat down in the glider. She quieted down right away, so I think she just had a bad dream.

I’d like to say I managed to fight off the monsters in her head and get her back to sleep, but it didn’t happen. While she was perfectly calm in my arms, she was wide awake and didn’t appreciate any attempts to get her back to sleep. So we were up for the day at 5am, which is about 3 hours before I consider it to be a new day. Ugh.

To add to the fun, she seems to have picked up her friend’s head cold, and is sporting the oh-so fashionable toddler snotty nose today. So much for going out to get pictures taken.

As for me, I somehow picked up a stomach bug. Remember what happened with Cordy and her stomach bug two weeks ago? Apparently now I’m living the sequel, only unlike her, I have control of my bowels, so no sheets to wash. It’s an improvement at least.

So please forgive this lack of a real post. I wanted to be witty and thought-provoking or at least amusing for you all today, but the early morning wake-up combined with illness has zapped me of my creativity and higher brain functions. We’re spending the day quarantined inside the house, still in our pajamas at 2:30pm, even though it’s gorgeous outside.

But not only do our kitties shower us with furry love, they also earn their keep. When we moved into our new house, we found a lot of spiders. Anyone who knows me knows that I am terrified of spiders. I hate them and their eight legs and their beady eyes.

I have a long-standing treaty with the spider species: if they remain outside the walls of my house and off of me and my family, I shall do them no harm. But if they come into my house, they forfeit their right to live. Sadly, many of them didn’t get the message, or chose to ignore it, and so have lost their lives.

One morning while still pregnant, I came downstairs to be greeted with a giant spider body at the foot of the stairs. I shrieked at first, then realized it was dead. Dante, my blue-point Siamese, was there next to it, proudly showing off his trophy. I gave him lots of praise as I disposed of the spider corpse.

Dante does a good job of dealing with spiders, although he has a tendency to play with them for too long, enabling some to escape. Then we got Marlowe, our kitten. Marlowe has more of the predatory instinct in him, along with a love of fresh spider for dinner.

These past few weeks, thanks to the nearly unending streak of rain, the spiders have been crossing territory lines in high numbers. And thankfully I am not greeted with spider bodies each day. Dante and Marlowe work together as a team to wear the spider down, and then Marlowe goes for the kill and eats the spider. Sometimes the spider fights back, but Marlowe doesn’t let a little pinch on the nose or mouth stop him. Each time I see a spider devoured, I reach for the treats and give both cats lots of praise.

But Marlowe has proven useful in other ways as well. He cleans up the crumbs Cordy drops when eating. (See? I told you they’re like dogs!) He also doesn’t limit his fresh meat to spiders. He also enjoys an occasional stray ant and moth.

After the perimeter has been patrolled and all arachnids are exterminated, the cats then provide the service of lap warmer to me on the couch. Who can resist service like that?

Thanks to all of you for your support regarding yesterday’s posts. We’ve both been under a lot of stress due to money, and with that stress comes fights. Like others, we don’t fight much, but when we do it tends to involve money. We’re both so run down from his job hunt and unexpected bills that it’s tough to be cheery sometimes. Your words of support really mean a lot to me.

So, to lighten the mood a bit, I’ve been tagged by Mrs. Fortune for another meme. So sit back and bask in the fluff of the meme!

The Three ______s on a Desert Island Meme

If you were stranded on a desert island (without Ginger and the Professor and all those folks to keep you amused), which three _____s would you bring?

Books

1. Les Miserables – Maybe being stranded on a desert island would finally give me the motivation I need to get through the entire unabridged version.
2. Complete Works of Shakespeare – I’m one of the few in this world who enjoy Shakespeare. At least there won’t be anyone there to roll their eyes at me.
3. The Harry Potter series – OK, I’m cheating. But if they were all packaged in a nice boxed set that would count, right?

Movies (assuming you had some way to watch them)

1. Moulin Rouge – Hard to explain, but I love this movie. It’s quirky, the music is amazing, and it’s one long stream of sensory overload, which I love. Some people have trouble keeping up with it, but I don’t mind at all, because every time I watch it, I see something new that I missed in previous viewings.
2. Pride & Prejudice (the 6 hr. BBC version) – If I’ve got lots of time to spare, I’m bringing along LONG movies! Seriously, this has been one of my favorites for a long time, and I credit it to a brilliant director, who captured the elegance and morality of the period perfectly, and Colin Firth, because, well, he has those eyes that pierce your soul.
3. The Princess Bride – Who isn’t happy after watching this movie? And who isn’t quoting it for the next week? “ROUS’s? I don’t think they exist.” “Inconceivable!” “You keep saying that word. I donn-a think it means what you-a think it means.”

Albums (also assuming you had some way to listen to them)

1. Once on this Island – I’m stuck on an island, so I might as well get into the tropical mood with this upbeat Caribbean musical.
2. Evanescence: Fallen – For days when I feel like something rock-ish, this would fit the bill nicely.
3. Shakira: Laundry Service – Love that Latin beat!

People (And your spouse/partner and children are NOT eligible here, because that goes without saying. Or at least if it doesn’t, that’s your problem)

1. My mom, because she’s one person I can always have a conversation with at any time. We always have something to talk about.
2. My friend Carolyn, because even on a deserted island, we’d still find something to rant and/or rave about. “Did you see that hermit crab’s shell? Talk about a fashion disaster!”
3. Steve from Blue’s Clues – Seriously, have you seen the guy’s personal web site? His FAQ alone is worth the read. He’s hilarious, and I think he would fit in so well with my group of friends. (Edit: I’m not saying he’s on my List of 5 or anything, just that he would be fun to hang out with. Read his site and tell me he doesn’t sound like fun.)

Once again, I shall be lazy in my tagging and simply say that if you are reading this and you found it interesting, you’re tagged!

More proof that money is evil:

I get a call from my husband to inform me that, “Even though you didn’t know it was going to end up this way, by leaving [company I used to work for] you fucked us.” There was a little more in the conversation, but that about sums up the conversation. I finally explained I needed to get off the phone and get back to work, and he said “Fine.” and hung up.

There was no point continuing on the conversation. When he’s in one of these furious moods, there is no reasoning with him, and I can’t find anything to say but, “I’m sorry” over and over again. He said it wasn’t my fault, but other than that sentence it didn’t sound, to me, like he thought it wasn’t my fault.

Because I work part-time, he is unable to ditch the full-time job gig and focus on theatre. He doesn’t think he’s going to get into the teacher training workshop next year for stage combat, and he isn’t able to go back for his master’s degree until I am done with school. So I guess it is all my fault.

Still, I hate sitting here at work, trying (in vain) not to cry, and hoping no one walks in to ask me anything.

This isn’t where we wanted to be. But we’re trying.

I hate money. Not in a I-want-to-be-poor kind of way, but in a I-wish-it-didn’t-run-our-lives kind of way.

Money is a requirement in today’s society, and generally the more the better. I grew up with not a lot – my mom was a single mom, and we did pretty well on $27K a year. Sure, I didn’t have designer clothing (which I really resented as a teen), but we had food, we had a house, and we even had some luxuries.

After college, I worked a series of low-paying jobs, but I was used to living on little, so it wasn’t too bad. Then I got the big job, and suddenly I was making more money than my own mom! To me at that time, $32K a year made me rich! I felt like I had made it in the world.

Currently, we make a bit more than that combined, but with a toddler and two adults, I don’t feel so rich anymore. Again, we’re not poor: we have a nice starter house, we have food, we have cars, and we have some luxuries (like Tivo).

But money is the big green monster that also is a part of our family, and I hate it. When I quit my job to take a part-time job, I had two contracting jobs lined up as well. Both fell through, which left us in a financial situation we didn’t want to be in.

We’re not drowning by any means; more like treading water at the moment, but one big crisis could be the wave that pulls us under.

On Friday, things were going well. The sun was out for the first time in weeks, and Cordy and I were returning from a playdate. Then I saw a light on the dashboard: the check engine light. And at that moment, my happy heart sank.

Here’s the brief history of my car. It’s a 2000 Nissan – my first large purchase when I landed my first big job. Great car, ran fine, until last year. It’s like it sensed money was tight for us, and decided it was time to give up. In one month’s time, the check engine light came on 4 times, and each time involved a different part of the engine or exhaust system needing replaced, to a total cost of over $2000.

The damn light is on again, and I dread what could be wrong now. To add to this problem, the air conditioning stopped working, and I think the brakes are nearing replacement. This could be that wave on the horizon, threatening to drown us.

If it’s a cheap fix, we’ll put it on the credit card and move on. If it’s not a cheap fix, it may be time to look into another car. A car payment is the last thing we need. Especially since my car is supposed to be the reliable one – Aaron’s car is a 96 Plymouth Breeze we bought from my grandmother. It also has high miles and could sputter and die at any time.

So now the big green monster is exerting his power over us. And like money has the ability to do, it’s affecting other areas of our lives. Aaron and I were snippy with each other last night, which I can only attribute to our money discussion. (It’s not my PMS. It’s never my PMS. Are we clear?) We accuse each other of wasting money, and then try to defend our own spending choices. Aaron and I rarely get into arguments, but I could feel the tension last night. It’s the same tension we had last year when my car’s repairs had made it’s own cozy space on our credit card bill, and the contracting jobs fell through.

Can you imagine what life would be like if money was no object? When you could just walk into a store and buy the item you want, not even concerned with the price tag? I’ve found myself occasionally jealous of people who have more money, but then I remind myself, you’re the one who chose a History degree. Should have gone to school for something more sensible, like Computer Science. Which is partially why I’m now back in school working on a nursing degree.

With the fate of my car unknown, this adds even more pressure to Aaron to get the job he interviewed for. Still no word from them yet, which is both promising and terrifying at the same time. I hope we’ll hear something, preferably positive, this week.

Things aren’t awful for us. Even with the car problems, we’ll still have food, we’ll still manage to keep our house, and we’ll still keep some luxuries. We may have to cut back in some areas (like eating out, which as of yesterday has been cut down to practically nothing) but we’ll figure out a way to make it all work.

But things would be so much easier if we didn’t have to worry about money.