A Mommy Story

In the past week I’ve described the token system we use for chores and good behavior for the kids to three different people, so I thought why not share it with everyone? We don’t give an allowance weekly at this point because neither of our girls have a strong enough grasp of money, and because many of the things they want aren’t things at all but privileges that have little to no cost to us.

We reward Cordy and Mira for good behavior and for helping around the house with doubloons. The idea was originally given to us by one of Cordy’s therapists, suggesting a token system can work well for kids with high-functioning autism, as they can see a concrete reward for tasks they accomplish and then use those tokens to “purchase” the perks they want.

The idea for using doubloons came from Jake and the Neverland Pirates last fall. Cordy saw it on TV and loved how the pirates collected doubloons for solving problems throughout the show. At the same time, Cordy was obsessed with dressing as a pirate princess for Halloween. Aaron realized that would be the perfect token system, so he bought a big bag of plastic gold coins, grabbed a mug for each kid (from our renaissance festival days) and we started to plan the system.

You can make the system as loose or rigid as you like. We’re somewhere in-between. There are daily tasks that they know they earn doubloons for – these are often tasks that they have trouble remembering to do, or are difficult things we want them to master.

For example, Cordy has trouble remembering to turn off her bedroom light each morning. She gets one doubloon for remembering to do it each morning. She also has to take a pill each morning, which she doesn’t like to do, so she gets a doubloon for doing that, too.

When the task can be done without reminder and without the need for a reward, we phase out the doubloon reward and find other routine tasks to reward for. They get doubloons for helping Aaron or I without complaining (like helping us load/unload the dishwasher or take out the recycling) and for assigned chores that they complete.

We also award them doubloons for good behavior. If they’re playing well together, or if they spontaneously do something helpful, they can get bonus doubloons. 

They keep their coins in the mugs and then use them to buy privileges. Some of the privileges they can choose from:

• Extra 20 min on the computer/iPad – 1 coin
• A treat of 1 piece of candy – 3 coins
• Staying up an extra 30 min after normal bedtime – 5 coins
• Getting fast food for dinner – 5 coins
• A trip out to the zoo or another fun place (if we didn’t already plan for it & time allowing) – 10 coins

Of course, anything that Aaron or I decide to offer to them doesn’t cost anything. If we plan to go to the zoo one Saturday, they aren’t required to pay. If they want something that isn’t on our list, we can assign a doubloon value to it. Mira once wanted a Happy Napper toy, but she had no money. We set a value of 20 doubloons for it, and she saved her coins until she could cash them in to buy her toy.

We like using this system at the moment because the coins have no actual money value (other than the few dollars it cost to buy the bag of them), so they can use them for non-money privileges like extra computer time or staying up late. Many times these privileges are just as valuable to them as anything they could buy. When they’re older we can move to an allowance instead of tokens, but at this age it works very well.

The system works well because it is flexible and can be adapted for nearly any family. You can set your own guidelines on how tokens are earned and cashed in, and you can adjust the rewards and tasks that earn tokens as a child grows and masters new skills. It’s a fun system that lets kids earn their privileges and gives parents a chance to set non-monetary rewards for good behavior. Win-win.