A Mommy Story

As many of you know, Cordelia’s name came from Shakespeare – King Lear, to be exact. We’re considering going with another Shakespeare name for baby #2, although looking back through the plays, there are some names that probably won’t make the short list.

Unfortunate Shakespeare names for girls:

Ophelia (Hamlet) – Beautiful name. And I’d put it on my short list in an instant. But let’s be honest: mommy already suffers from a mental disorder (depression), and we really don’t need to encourage it in the kids.

Desdemona (Othello) – She was innocent, but let’s not pick a name with domestic violence attached to it.

Volumnia (Coriolanus) – We’d just be encouraging fat jokes with this one.

Regan (King Lear) – Sorry, I lived through that president. Try again.

Goneril (King Lear) – I have a strict policy on no names that sound like STDs.

Violenta (All’s Well That Ends Well) – That name is just asking for a girl with a chip on her shoulder.

Hymen (As You Like It) – Forget the policy on STDs – no names that sound like anything dealing with reproductive organs.

Mopsa (The Winter’s Tale) – This is an especially bad name if she inherits the same mop of hair that Cordy has.

Dorcas (The Winter’s Tale) – No explanation needed, I think.

Maybe we should branch out to the works of Marlowe or Jonson?