Domesticity, Conferences and Dresses

Over the weekend we moved a little closer in my goal of making this house look like it has permanent residents and not just transients passing through. Two more rooms have curtain rods! Like, real curtain rods screwed into the walls, and not spring rods. That makes twice as many as we previously had.

 Please ignore the bad lighting, ugly ceiling and lack of paint. Work in progress, folks.

The living room curtain rod (which I bought over two months ago and has been sitting in a box) is also now in place, although still lacking in anything to put on it. But now that it’s in place, I’m more motivated to buy curtains. Mira’s room also has a new curtain rod and new curtains. No surprise, she picked pink striped curtains.

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I’m also making progress on my desk area. I bought this file organizer at TJ Maxx and can’t wait to hang it on the wall and start using it:

I love the chalkboard panels on each pocket. I don’t have a lot of papers I need for work, but if I hang it just off to the side of the desk, I can also use it to organize school papers, tax info, etc. There’s a lot of possibility with it.

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Mira recently asked me to make her a shawl. She had noticed the shawl I occasionally wrap myself in and when she found out that I made it, she wanted one, too. It’s been over a year since I knit anything, mostly due to an inability to carve out time for myself, so I thought this might be a good way to get me back into knitting. I clearly had no idea what I was agreeing to, however, when I took her out on Sunday to pick out the yarn for her project:

Ouch. Hot pink with bits of metallic shimmer. Well, at least there will be no way to lose her when she wears it. She’ll probably be visible on Google Earth maps.

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I’m going to the Blissdom conference later this week in Dallas. This will be my first trip to Texas, not counting changing plans in Houston a few times. I’m looking forward to seeing old friends and meeting lots of new bloggers and generally immersing myself in the blogging world for a few days.

Going to blog conferences now (for me, at least) isn’t so much about picking up new tricks for blogging as it is about networking and getting inspired. I’m fairly set in my ways, but I love finding new folks to read and hearing the “we matter” blogger pep talk that refreshes me and keeps me writing.

I still have to pack everything for the trip, which is the worst part of going to any conference. It seems like the minute I need to pack for a trip, my entire closet of clothing is suddenly too tight, too loose, or doesn’t match with anything else. Frustrating.

And of course there’s the flying part. I still hate flying. Here’s hoping it’s a smooth flight so I don’t grab the arm of the person next to me if there’s turbulence.

Anyone else going to be at Blissdom? I’m usually not hard to find, since I rarely stay in one spot for long. As long as you’re in one spot, I’m sure I’ll pass by. On Friday night, you’ll probably see me in a dress that looks a lot like this:

Only mine has cap sleeves and is longer.

I’ll be reviewing this dress soon. I received it for review from eShakti, and (spoiler!) I love the dress and the company. I’ve yet to find anywhere else that will customize a dress to fit you perfectly. (If you’re already interested in shopping for a new dress, I have a coupon code for your order – just use the code MMMYSTRY for 20% off.)

Now everyone think good thoughts that I don’t spill something all over myself or fall down stairs or completely offend someone with an ADD-moment or do something else to embarrass myself while I’m at Blissdom. (I’ll also chicken out on karaoke to keep myself from absolute embarrassment.)



Home (Mis)Adventures

Remember back in March when I had all these grand ideas of getting domestic and making some much-needed updates to our house? It was all good intentions, but other than clearing out a bunch of clutter, nothing else has been done.

Don’t get me wrong – clearing out the clutter has been a HUGE undertaking alone. It’s amazing what nine years of “just put that there and we’ll deal with it later” can do to every closet and corner of your house.

Example? This is only part of what came out of our hall closet:

The box in the foreground is STUFFED with reusable shopping bags.

I found my BlogHer ’07 swag bag at the bottom of that closet, along with business cards from several bloggers from years ago. The majority of the closet was reusable shopping bags. Forget the plastic bag crisis – we now have a reusable shopping bag crisis. Where’s the Pinterest boards for recycling your reusable shopping bags into something decorative or useful when you don’t need the hundreds of bags you have? Even my Costco trips don’t require that many bags.

The closet looks a lot more empty now. Considering we have no basement and that closet is the only safe spot in the house in the event of a tornado, it’s nice to know we won’t have to throw five feet of bags and junk out of it just to fit inside.

The swanky red plaid hunting jacket needs to be returned to my mom.

But every other project I had planned was stalled due to a lack of time and money. It helps that we’re now back to two full-time incomes (yay!) but the debt left behind from previous periods still has to be addressed.

A few months ago, I looked into refinancing our house to free up some extra money. We had an FHA loan and I learned about the streamline FHA refinance program, which is supposed to be an easier way to refinance the mortgage, with fewer requirements and relaxed standards. Seeing how the value of our house has declined as we paid down the mortgage – to the point that it’s worth about what we still owe – it sounded like the perfect program for us to lower our interest rate and payments.

Believe me, folks, getting a mortgage is nothing like it was in 2003. In 2003 we filled out an application and then went to closing when our house was ready, signed some papers, and received money back at the closing. Our down-payment was covered, and there was practically no verification of anything. It felt like a relaxing day out with a new house at the end of it.

Now? There are a lot more hoops to jump through. And they’re smaller. And possibly on fire, too.

Despite this being a streamline refinance, with no appraisal needed and fewer requirements from us regarding income and debt, it was not an easy process. I think it was easier for Aaron to get his military security clearance than it was for us to prove our employment and income.

We went through our current lender because they offered us a discount on closing costs. After filling out the initial application and mailing it back, we were told that a few forms were missing and asked to fax them back immediately. I remembered filling those forms out, but whatever – I faxed them in again.

A week later we were told additional documents were missing and they needed them ASAP. Funny, again they were forms we had already filled out, including one that I had sent back twice already. Fill out, fax, repeat. This happened another round as well.

Then there were issues documenting my employment and income. Now understand: we were using our current lender to refinance to a lower interest rate so we could pay less for our mortgage each month. We have a perfect record of (higher) payments for our mortgage, so why such concern over our ability to cover the lower payments?

Finally, a closing date was set, 83 days after the application started and 7 days away from losing our rate lock. Even two days before closing, another hoop was placed in front of us, as they demanded to see that we had the closing costs in our checking account before they could finalize everything (this was never mentioned before), and so money had to be shifted around and a method of proof found.

This morning, despite my fears that they’d find another reason to make it not happen, we signed all of the paperwork and closed on our new mortgage. We’re saving over $200 a month on our mortgage now, which will mostly be used to help finance all of the improvements we want to make around here. I’m almost giddy at the thought of picking out paint and getting estimates on the breakfast bar I want to add to the kitchen.

I’m definitely not a DIY blogger, but I’m planning to detail some of the changes we make to the house going forward. Or at the very least it’ll be a “what not to do” series.



Itty-Bitty Christmas Trees

My plans to turn this house into a home have already started. Step one was putting into motion a way for me to feel comfortable opening the curtains in my living room that look out into my backyard. Why? Because with the apartments behind us, it now feels like the backyard and the back of our house are exposed to everyone in that community watching us all the time.

Village Communities/Ardent Communities (if I haven’t made this clear, avoid renting or buying from this company at all costs) FINALLY put up the fence for their apartments, but they didn’t even connect it to the other part of their fence. So anyone could walk 100 feet beyond our house and come around to the other side of the fence and into our neighborhood’s backyards. At the moment that six foot fence also has a packed-down dirt mound three feet high on the other side – you could practically hop over it from their side. Way to do the minimum and still be jerks, VC.

Several people had suggested getting some trees to help block the view, so I didn’t sit on my sofa and stare at a panoramic view of bland, depressing apartments every day. Thankfully, Fall is a great time to buy trees from the local nurseries at a nice discount.

My mom (the one with the green thumb) went with me to pick out the right trees, and we brought home five little emerald green arbor vitae evergreens at half off. At the moment they’re about three feet tall. They grow to be about ten feet tall and about four feet wide, and have the advantage of being trees that require very little maintenance. Plant them in a good spot, water them, and let them grow – perfect for someone who can’t even keep a garden growing.

All of our electric and gas lines are buried just outside of our fence, so we had to plant them inside the fence. Taking visual perspective into consideration, this isn’t a bad thing since they’ll block the view even sooner than if they were planted further away.

My little green sentinels, standing guard.

Of course, Mira took one look at them and exclaimed that they were “the most perfect little Christmas trees!” she had ever seen. They’re still getting used to their new home, but I have a feeling that next year these new trees will be decorated by a certain little girl who can’t stand to see a blank canvas.

Naturally, it’ll take years for them to reach their maximum height. That part isn’t so fun. Maybe I can find some plant steroids to get them growing faster?  I also need to plant a few more to give us full coverage – I didn’t realize just how long my backyard is.

Ah well, if they don’t block the view for me, at least they’ll block the view for the next people to own this house. And just knowing they’re out there makes me feel happy.

Screening trees? Check. (Well, in a few years. They’re just cute evergreens at the moment.) My curtain rod arrived for the living room this week, so that may be my next project. No more spring rod curtains!



Making A Home Out Of Our House

We’ve lived in this house for over eight years now. It’s our first house, and the only home our two daughters have ever known.

So why, after eight years, do we have only ONE room painted, and still have nothing hung on walls? Remove the furniture and it’s builder’s standard white through most of the house.

I have no actual answer for that question. We were in such a rush to move in once the house was ready that we didn’t take the time to paint before we moved everything in. So the only room that was painted was Cordy’s room, since I was pregnant at the time and it was the one room that had no furniture at first. I also didn’t want to hang anything on the walls until they were painted.

We also never planned to stay here this long. During the big housing boom, it was common to buy a house and sell it for a profit within four to five years. We bought a house that fit our modest budget, expecting our salaries to go up, and to make a profit on the house, so we could trade up to a better neighborhood.

Ha. Sometimes fate likes to kick you down a notch. Four years after we signed the mortgage agreement, instead of looking for our next home, we were struggling to make payments for this home and keep our family together.

And now four years later, we’re still here. We didn’t lose the house (thank goodness!) but at the moment we also have no ability to sell it without taking a loss. Most homes in our neighborhood are selling for far less than their original prices. To make it worse, there’s this immediately behind us:

Still getting uglier every day!

I think we still haven’t made any changes over bitterness at not being able to leave. The house has become a prison, reminding us every day that we’re stuck here and not going anywhere anytime soon. We were lucky enough to not lose it through the recession, but now we find it also won’t let us go.

I’ve gone through the stages of grief over being stuck in this house, and I may have finally reached acceptance, or at least a temporary acceptance. I still have no intention of staying here beyond another few years, but I’ve also hit the point where I’m ready to live here, not just subsist here.

All of our walls are still white (except for Cordy’s room). Nothing has been hung on the walls. The house still looks like we’re apartment dwellers afraid to do anything to the standard built-ins for fear of losing our security deposit. But this is our home. It’s time to start treating it as such. There’s no need to keep it neutral in decor unless that’s what we want.

We’re refinancing the house using a new refinance option to cut down our monthly mortgage, freeing up a little more money each month. We’re no longer in that dire situation from four years ago, so we can spend a little money on simple updates to the house.

And now I have home remodel fever.

I want to paint, to hang cabinets, to install a backsplash in the kitchen, to put in new faucets…the list goes on and on. Pinterest DIY boards are now my unhealthy obsession.

There’s only one teensy-tiny problem: I have no talent or skill in home remodeling.

I also can’t seem to find anywhere to learn these skills. Some of the home superstores offer workshops on limited projects, but I need the absolute basics.

I guess I have a little time before I need to figure out how to use power tools. Because before we can begin many of these projects, we also have to clear out a LOT of clutter. About eight years worth of apathy clutter in this house. Starting with the garage.
 

 That’s the real, unedited, garage mess. And that’s also after several hours of clearing out a large part of it and sending six boxes to Goodwill.
I’m writing all of this out here to hold myself accountable to begin these changes in our house. It’s time to make this place a home.


Dish Suds, Domestic Disasters, and P&G Deals For You

As has been established, I’m useless when it comes to basic domestic activities. We all have our talents – mine are recalling large amounts of information, figuring out technical subjects, math, directions, and sticking my foot my my mouth (figuratively, not literally on that last one, although that would be a talent). Cooking, cleaning, organizing? Not my best subjects.

So the first time I ever washed dishes, you can guess it was a disaster. I had watched in commercials as Dawn dish soap was squirted on dishes and the oily grime just ran away in fear, or at least that’s how it looked to my eight year old self. I figured I could help my mom out by doing the same. I grabbed our bottle of Dawn and went to work in the kitchen sink.

I squirted a little on the glass casserole dish, the plates, the cups…and nothing happened. So I squirted a little more. Or maybe a lot more. Then I remembered that I’d need a lot of water, too. I’d watched my mom add Dawn to the water, so I continued squirting Dawn into the sink as I plugged the drain and turned on the hot water.

As you probably know, a little Dawn goes a long way. And a lot goes, well, an even LONGER way. I wasn’t paying attention to the sink filling as I reached under the counter to get the dish drainer and set it on the counter, so I missed that all of that dish soap was quickly creating a mountain of suds that would quickly erupt into an avalanche.

When I saw the suds had claimed the sink and were now creeping onto the countertop and over the side, I quickly turned off the water. I had a mix of horror and delight at the sight in front of me. I didn’t plan on creating a suds monster and would have to somehow clean it all up, but also WOW look at all the fun suds!

It was still disappointing to me that the food didn’t magically disappear from the dishes, but it did come off fairly quickly with a little work. Too bad I didn’t understand rinsing, as I set the dishes in the drying rack, still with some suds on them. Or that suds on the floor still needed to be cleaned up – I assumed that since it was soap, it was doing the floor a favor and no further assistance was needed.

My mom (who amazingly kept her composure) appreciated the gesture when she saw it, but then asked me to not help with the dishes again as she re-washed all of the dishes and cleaned the dish soap from the counter and floor.

So I’m better at it now and can wash a sink of dishes successfully. Aaron generally handles the dishes now, but when I do it I try to make it as pleasant as possible. I still like Dawn dish soap, although we’ve moved beyond the old blue formula to their new Dawn Ultra Hand Renewal – Olay Beauty Pomegranate Splash Scent. It smells great, and the formula actually moisturizes my hands.

Love the Pomegranate scent!

My eight year old self might not have minded the dry, tight feeling from having my hands in hot water for a long period, but at 36 I’m doing my best to keep my hands from getting ahead of me in the age game. This Dawn helps my hands feel soft and smooth while still getting our dishes clean. I’m all about multitasking.

And here’s the whole point of this story: I’m partnering with Procter & Gamble to help promote their new P&G eStore. Nearly every product made by P&G can be found in their store, including the Dawn Ultra Hand Renewal – Olay Beauty Pomegranate Splash Scent. I’ve looked around and found their prices to be as good as or even better than the store sale prices in our area.

Some products have instant coupons that can be applied immediately – no need to hunt around for coupon codes. They currently have some back-to-school and Olympics themed product bundles right now, helping you save even more for products you already use.

You’ll get free shipping for any purchase of $25 or more, too. I don’t need to tell you how fantastic that is – why haul all of your favorite home and personal items from the store (large size Tide containers can be heavy!) when you can have them delivered right to your doorstep for free?

Plus, if you shop through my specific link, you can also get 10% off your entire order this month. I must point out that I receive a commission from anything you buy in the P&G store from my link, too, which is mighty helpful with all of the back-to-school expenses coming up. So really, you’re getting a deal for yourself and helping me afford shoes for two children who grow too quickly. Or Dawn dish soap, if they take after me in their dish-washing abilities.

Feel free to pass my link along to friends and family so they can get in on the deals as well – I only get the commission if you shop through my link.

And if you do take advantage of the 10% off and shop through my link, please leave a comment and let me know what you bought! (Unless you’re buying personal items you’d prefer not to share. Or maybe you do want to tell me about your tampons – I’m OK with it either way!)

Now if you’ll excuse me, it’s time to go buy my Puffs and Bounty multi-packs for our school supply lists.

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